Making Your Own Romance Luck
Mistakes in romance are probably inevitable. The point is that you should make new and different mistakes and not continue making the same mistake over and over again.
I’m always a little amused at the “romantic quizzes” that I see in newspapers and magazines. Far too many of them focus for too much on physical appearance and far too little on personality compatibility and important character traits (honesty, loyalty, etc.).
Some personalities just aren’t compatible, and some character traits aren’t acceptable for YOU. And it doesn’t matter whether the other person meets your physical appearance expectations or not; if you don’t like WHO they are, they aren’t for you! His fun-loving personality isn’t going to mix well with your serious nature. Her constant concern over her personal comfort isn’t going to work well with your love of camping, fishing, and hiking expeditions. His or her attitude that “if you can get away with it, it isn’t wrong” is going to be unbearable to you with your basic belief in complete honesty.
Of course, physical attraction is important. Physical attraction always comes first, but it isn’t what comes next. The point is you have to actually LIKE the person who lives inside the body that you find attractive. The body is going to change. Time takes care of that. But the personality and the character isn’t going to change much. An outgoing personality is probably always going to be an outgoing personality, and a person who is honest when he or she is 20 will still be honest when he or she is 80.
I’m not saying that two people must have identical personalities to be compatible. Opposites attract! But I am saying that each partner needs to actually LIKE who the other person really is. That’s where romance starts. Liking leads to romance. Romance leads to loving. Loving leads to ÖÖ marriage.